What is ghosting?
Why does ghosting hurt?
I’ve been ghosted. What now?
First things first, chin up. If you’re feeling confused, sad or disappointed, know that you’re not alone! With the rise of online dating apps, ghosting is becoming more and more common, with 13% to 23% of adults reporting that they’ve been ghosted by a romantic partner.
But just because it’s quite common, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. If it’s taken its toll on your self-confidence, it’s time to get you feeling wonderful again: recall all of your previous dating successes, blast some confidence-boosting tunes and remember that it’s their loss!
It’s also important to remember that, in most cases, ghosting says a lot more about the other person (and their communication style) than it does about you.
Why do people ghost?
- To avoid confrontation: It’s no newsflash that rejecting someone feels uncomfortable for everyone involved. So, to avoid that confrontation and protect their own emotions, the person decides to remove themselves from your life without any explanation at all.
- It’s the easy way out: Maybe they weren’t feeling a connection with you and instead of taking the time and effort to communicate that to you, they go for the low effort route: ignoring you completely.
- They simply forgot to reply: Let’s be honest, life can be busy, stressful and tough at times. Maybe they’re going through a rough patch and dating is no longer their top priority.
What should I do instead of ghosting someone?
- I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you but I just don’t see you in a romantic way.
- I think you’re an awesome person but I’m looking for something else right now.
- It was really great talking to you but XYZ is a dealbreaker for me. I don’t see this working out but I wish you all the best!
Is ghosting ever acceptable?
There’s no denying that ghosting sucks. If you’ve been ghosted, it might take a while to get over it. But (like with everything) there’s a silver lining to being ghosted…
If the person isn’t able to communicate openly, honestly and respectfully with you, they’re probably not the one for you anyway! Maybe it’s better the relationship ended sooner rather than later. You deserve better – let that ghost float away!
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