Ghosting has become so common that the term has made it into our everyday lingo. Being ghosted is when someone you’ve been talking to suddenly goes silent. This silence could be temporary, but oftentimes, it is permanent. The silence can happen without explanation, warning, or a trigger.
This sudden silence can be shocking, especially when both of you have been texting and communicating regularly. The most frustrating part is also that their silence means you’ll never know why or what made them disappear.
But what you should know is that it isn’t your fault and it was them who didn’t have the courage to tell you how they felt about you before they pulled a disappearing act. Yes, we know it sucks, and it will take you time to get over them. Here are some tips we hope will help.
Ghosted? Here Are 10 Tips to Help You Move On
1. Set a time limit
Sometimes they may be busy. Set a time limit to how long you’d need before you define it as ghosting. If they don’t contact you after, you can safely assume you’ve been ghosted.
2. Acknowledge that it happened
Acknowledging it is the first step. They are not busy. They simply did not bother to respectfully communicate their unavailability to you.
3. Don’t take the blame
Know that it is not your fault. You do not need to take responsibility for their inability to tell you what they wanted before they pulled a fast one.
4. Send a closure text
Once you’ve hit your time limit, craft a short, respectful text to let them know you’re assuming that they don’t wish to engage further and that you’ll be moving on. Send it without expecting a reply.
5. Set boundaries
If they do reply and apologize, it still doesn’t change the fact that they disappeared suddenly. If you have already decided to move on, set clear boundaries by thanking them and then moving on.
6. Spend time with loved ones
Being ghosted can cause you to overanalyze your actions, dates, and texts, and wonder if it was something wrong with you that caused it. Spend time with people who love and appreciate you.
7. Have an accountability buddy
Talk to someone you trust about your feelings and get your friend to keep you in check. Whenever you feel like checking out their social media accounts or texting them (again), get your friend to stop you.
8. Get the help you need
The trauma of being ghosted can cause more than just a broken heart. If you still can’t get over it after a while, don’t be afraid to seek professional help.
9. Get out and get moving
It might be tempting to coop yourself up at home but get out there, get some sunlight and get moving. This triggers the release of feel-good hormones like endorphins and serotonin.
10. Live your best life
Remember that you are deserving of love, communication, and proper closure. Whether it’s dating again, doing something you feel passionate about, or treating yourself, know that your life can still be great without that person.
Sarah C.
Sarah C. is a writer from Singapore, who runs on caffeine. She loves a good rom-com and considers 10 Things I Hate About You her all-time favorite. Her dating pet peeves are those who are rude to waiters, and those who can't stop looking at their phones.
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