5 Tips on How to Stop Chasing Someone and Start Getting Chosen

Woman chasing after a guy

They’re just not that into you. Here’s how to stop chasing someone and get chosen!

You’re in a tough spot, you like someone. Whether it be an ex you never got over, an old hookup you caught feelings for or just someone you met at Starbucks a few weeks back. You’ve tried EVERYTHING, but nothing seems to work. 

They don’t take any of your hints; they ignore you and sometimes just act like you’re not even there, no matter how hard you try to get them to like you back. You’ve had enough. It’s time to stop thinking you’re not good enough for the person you’re chasing. It’s time to start getting chosen.

These 5 steps will make sure you get over them and start attracting the right people:

1) Accept the truth

You tried your hardest, you gave them all the hints, were always your best self around them and did pretty much everything right, but it’s clear that they’re just not interested. Maybe it’s time to face the truth. They’re not into you and that must sting.

Don’t beat yourself up over it. It will feel like you just got hit by a truck for a while, but you’re going to thank yourself later. You accepted the reality and did the right thing. Remember: your own emotional wellbeing should always be your main priority, not someone else’s. And besides, there are plenty of better ways to attract someone you like.

2) Take some time for yourself

In our world of fast cars, fast internet and fast food, everyone wants everything FAST.
Slow down a bit! People always think that we have to be fast to keep up with the world, but if you slow down and just take some time for yourself, the world will have to adjust to you.

After accepting your truth, try taking it slow. Find things you enjoy doing and make YOU happy. Good things take time! Once you start to realize that, the world is your oyster. It will completely change your perspective when it comes to love, friendships and relationships.

3) Focus on you

A study conducted by The Society for Personality and Social Psychology on The Attractiveness of Confidence showed that people generally find someone who is confident, independent and who have their life together more attractive than those who don’t. So if you want to be the one people go crazy for, be the BEST version of you that you can be. Start prioritizing your health, get started on that business idea you’ve always wanted to explore or do pretty much anything that makes you happier, more confident and more YOU.

But NEVER do it for someone else. Do it for yourself. Once you start doing that, then nothing can stop you. People notice when someone is truly happy and just loves being themselves. When they notice that, all they’re going to think about is how they can just be a part of that happiness and be a part of your life.

4) Let them know you’re interested

Don’t you hate it when someone gives you mixed signals? It gets confusing and makes you lose interest, and that’s just how other people feel. It’s always important to let whoever you’re interested in know that you’re interested in them. This always helps to start off relationships as it provides a clear sense of communication between the two individuals and also helps to push your relationship forward.

You can let them know by giving them signs, such as changing your body language around them, being flirtatious and just by making it easier for them to catch on. It all depends on how you want to do it; you want them to fall in love with you and who you are. So add your own spin on things, and show them how you are unique in your own way. Just be YOU.

5) Don't be too accessible

Once someone likes you and you two hit it off, they’re going to see if they can take it up a notch. That means they’re going to ask you to hang out or to go on a date. BUT, if you have something else to do, don’t drop everything to go whenever THEY want (especially on short notice). Be honest and let them know you’ve already got plans.

This will make them realize that you have a lot going for yourself. It’s going to show them that they’re not the only important thing in your life and that if they are going to be in your life, it’s because you WANT them to be there and not because you NEED them to be.

At the same time don’t create fake plans just to make it seem like you’re busy. Instead, go on with your everyday life that you had prior to meeting them. Never forget, YOU are your main priority.

If the tips on this list didn’t really feel like things you could do, don’t lose hope. Dating is a personal experience, everyone has their own way of ‘making it work’, find yours, we’re always here to help you out. Most importantly, be yourself. If someone doesn’t like you for you, they’re not worth your time.
Nithin Jacob

Nithin Jacob

Nithin Jacob is a content writer and animator from Abu Dhabi with a Master's in Arts. He focuses on providing insight on all aspects of online dating, relationships, and compatibility with his experience in both short and long-term relationships. Right now, Nithin is newly engaged after a long-term relationship of 2 years.

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