10 Practical Confidence Tips for a First Date

March 16, 2022
1:40 pm

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Almost everyone gets first-date jitters. It’s way more common than you’d imagine! If you’re anxious, know that your date’s likely feeling the same. Before you suggest canceling or postponing your date in favor of staying home in your comfort zone, breathe and read on these confidence tips for a first date.

We can’t guarantee an amazing date (that’s up to the both of you!) but what we can help with is giving you some confidence tips so you’ll rock up to your first date unafraid and ready for whatever the date might bring.

1) Have a pre-date routine

Avoid focusing too much on the date. Do a workout before or have a mini spa session. The endorphins will help you relax and feel like the best version of yourself.

2) Groom yourself

If you look good, you’ll probably feel good. To ease dating anxiety, start small – shave, trim, wash your hair, take a shower.

3) Make it short

Most of us feel confident when we’re in control. Keep the date plan short, so you know you have an out if things go south. You also feel less pressured to keep coming up with conversation starters.

4) Prepare backups

Things can go wrong like your card gets declined, a button pops, or your lipstick smudges. Instead of picturing worst-case scenarios, calm your fears by bringing a spare card, safety pin, lipstick, or whatever you think you might need.

5) Do your homework beforehand

Coming up with topics can be stressful. Review your date’s profile and exchanged messages for ideas and conversation starters.

6) Arrive with minutes to spare

Don’t be late and flustered. Map your route ahead and arrive 10 minutes early. If you don’t want to seem overzealous, stroll around the area until date time.

7) Watch your words

No need to censor yourself, but use language that shows confidence. Avoid overusing words like “maybe” and “I think”. Don’t be afraid to show decisiveness and a strong opinion, but do so with tact.

8) Treat your waiters and bartenders well

If you treat your waiters or bartenders well, it displays subtle confidence and kindness. It also demonstrates how you treat people, which includes how you’ll treat your date.

9) Mirror their actions

If you’re still facing anxiety midway, start mirroring your date – how they fold their arms, shift, or smile. Studies show people find you more desirable if you mimic them.

10) Put yourself out there

Vulnerability is attractive and encourages openness from your date. It’s not easy but if you can do so skillfully, you naturally appear more confident of yourself and or what you bring to the table.

Beyond all these tips, the important thing is to remember to have fun and enjoy yourself. A first date is just a chance for the both of you to see if you vibe. If you do, great. If you don’t, at least you know you tried. So either way, it’s a good step to take towards meeting that special someone.

Sarah C.

Sarah C. is a writer from Singapore, who runs on caffeine. She loves a good rom-com and considers 10 Things I Hate About You her all-time favorite. Her dating pet peeves are those who are rude to waiters, and those who can't stop looking at their phones.